Warning: Full spoilers for the episode follow...
Vampire attacks are way up, human retaliation's on the rise and Sookie...kills a newly-vampiric Coroner Spencer with a pair of chopsticks. Yes, "Gone, Gone, Gone" was a bit of a mess mess mess, but it was also probably the most ridiculously quotable episode of the season so far. And by quotable, I mean True Blood quotable; the sassy, filthy silly kind that sound like they should be followed by a z-snap. From Tara doing an homage to Butterfly McQueen ("I don't know nothin' about birthin' no baby vampires!") to Hoyt's mama calling Jessica a "cheeto-headed tramp" to Pam using the phrase "d***head dipped in afterbirth," this episode was primarily played for s***s and giggles.
Bill was on FaceTime, Russell and Steve danced to "Teenage Dream," and some glyph expert claimed to have an ex-wife who named her toes. Yes, it was a happening. Unfortunately, this episode was also all over the map; as demonstrated by Eric and Nora seeing visions of both Lilith and Godric and Russell maniacally revealing that he doesn't give a crap about Lilith and the council. Yes, I understand that Lilith killing Godric represented her blood presence overtaking his, but it was still loopy. And while Russell may have seemed completely anti-religion back when he killed Roman, he'd since fallen in with the flock. And if he was merely faking it the whole time well, that wasn't clearly established. It really just seemed like he had a tantrum. One where his accent changed. His accent did change, right? To something Eastern Euro. I'm not the only one who heard it, right?
On the upside, Russell directly addressed the fact that he'd been wrongfully sidelined when he's clearly stronger than any of the other vampires. Also, he's circled back to his unfinished fairy blood business from Season 3. Which, when you combine with his wolf pack, might mean that we could get some payoff/closure regarding stuff from two years back. True Blood has the strangest ways of leaving things off in an episode, doesn't it? Russell running off and all the other vampires looking confused. Sam and Luna in mid-Emma heist. It always feels weird. Like when we left Sam and that one "Obama" in mid-hospital fight a few episodes back.
And I like that Sam and Luna going after Emma, as well as Luna being so mad that she wants to tell the world about shifters and wolves, but didn't it seem weird to have their panicky, planning-to-get-close-to-Steve scene after the scene where Sam stopped the dude at the diner from shooting Jess? Was he just there working a shift while Emma was off and kidnapped? Did he just tell Luna to hang tight by the computer while he went to work the bar? Despite having a business to run, wouldn't Emma being taken by a vampire be priority number one? Sam basically sacrificed his life for Luna and Emma in the season premiere.
The star of this clumsy episode, however, was Jess. Man, Deborah Ann Woll is so good and I find myself wanting to follow her story, and follow her as the protagonist, more than any other character on the show. And as much as I'm over Hoyt and his moping, the scene (which still felt a bit odd in the midst of all the kookiness of the episode) where Hoyt tearfully asked Jessica to "Eternal Sunshine" him with her glamour powers was pretty good. I mean, there's nothing that will make you feel more like crap than someone legitimately wanting to forget you forever. That scene, plus Jason pulling over Hoyt to say goodbye (in a way), definitely felt like a goodbye to Hoyt. Which is fine. Hoyt's entire persona was based on his story with Jess. It's time for him to go. And it was a good end. Now I hope that, you know, he doesn't come back. Until next season at least. Let it the finality of the scenes be somewhat final.
I still don't really buy Bill as a villain. Even after he app-staked Molly. But watching him bible-thump in front of Jess (who's no stranger to bible-thumping) did help paint him up as creep. I think Jess now being among the crazy, brainwashed AVLers gets us a few steps closer to this case getting closed. And because of her past relationship with Bill, we'll be able to accept him more as a changed vampire. Again though, I'd much rather see Jess figure all this out and save that day than Sookie, who's still trying to figure out her fairy mystery. At this point, I'm more invested in Jess's relationship with bad Bill than Sookie's. And I guess we can count Eric among the glassy-eyed now too. With his vision of Godric now decimated, I can't figure out how he could be faking any of this. Which is strange when you think of this being the second season now, in a row, that Eric's been under some sort of mind-control.
Pam and Tara still amuse me, especially since they already managed to put an end to Sheriff Douchenozzle. It was fun to see the difference in their ideologies; with Pam wanting to go on the run and Tara wanting to stay and fight. Right now, these two, plus Jess, are the only sort of "front line" the show's got against the religious nuts, and I'd be more than fine if it stayed that way.
Matt Fowler is a writer for IGN. Follow him on Twitter at @TheMattFowler and IGN. WARNING: No Nudity!
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